I went to his mother’s house at last and Cathy came and sat beside me holding my hand, listening quietly while I tried to explain my complex emotions.Gently Cathy said, “You make it all too complicated Carmen. There is only one question for you to answer for yourself. “Do you want to go with him or not?”I groaned and said. “You know very well I do Cathy.”I saw the satisfaction in his eyes, but I could not even feel angry with her as I was too disturbed and troubled by my own emotions. I had no time to worry about other people. Cathy had not made any secret of her desire to get us back together again.She hesitated a moment and I could feel she wanted to tell me something but was hesitating, so I urged her.“ Cathy please tell me what is bothering you?”“Carmen before he had the accident he wanted to see you again,” Cathy went out hurriedly. “I knew that. He had you permanently on his mind from the beginning as there were hundred little pointers, pointing to the fact but he was afraid you would refuse in such a way that it would scar him even more.”My temper flared and I said.” Scar? What's Scars? You sound sometimes as though he needed sympathy from me but what happened was his doing not mine. I'd like to see him burning in hell Cathy. I hate him!”Silently Cathy looked at me and shook her head implying that she did not believe a word of it and I was subsiding with my feelings again in too desperate and sick of myself, sick of Marc, sick of everything. “It all seemed cut and dried a few weeks ago,” I said in a dry voice. “I hated him. I could have stepped over in a gutter if he was bleeding to death and never stopped to look. These last few weeks have undermined me, and I sometimes I suspect he's done it all by himself, I began to doubt has he really lost his memory or just played some elaborate play game with me.”“And if he was doing it would you understand Carmen?”I stiffened. Was I admitting it? I stared at her. “Is he doing it Cathy?”“The doctor says not,” Lydia said flatly. “But his behavior shows, he's genuinely blocked out all his memory of the past but Carmen if he had been pretending could you understand his need to approach you for his pride sake? Marc is a true Garcia. His pride is massive it always has been. It would be a failure in his masculinity for him to admit his weakness, particularly before a woman. Will you forgive him?”“He trampled on my pride,” I said. “Why should I forgive him for protecting his own? “ Cathy just shook and shrugged his shoulders and said. “A woman’s pride is expandable, we both know that. We have never put so much emphasis on it have we? It is men who treasure it, fight for it and are prepared to die for it. Women on the other hand have more practical common sense than to sacrifice so much as a hair for pride. ““You are talking about Italians,” I said, faintly smiling. “I wouldn’t talk of dying for pride’s sake believe me.”Cathy looked at me with her dark bright eyes . “But we are talking about Marc, Your husband, and my son.”Flushing, I shook my head. “ He is my husband only in papers Cathy, we separated a long time back.”“Not in your heart? Cathy said gently. "And you know it better Carmen."“When I saw him with Bella he killed my heart," I said trying to make her understand how I felt Cathy had always been good to me so did not want to keep her in any dilemma. “My heart was dead and when I came out of that and had Tio. I learned better never to give my heart away ever again, as I was full-time devoted as a mother, giving all my love to my son. Cathy, Marc is not my husband in any sense of the word. As he did not even believe that I could get pregnant with his son. Our marriage did not end up only because of his infidelity but because of his lack of trust.“I am sorry Carmen but you gave us the reason to think that it was not Marc's but Blade’s and Marc choose to believe that you conceived Blade's child. That reminds me how is he and how is he taking the news about you staying here for a while? If you want I can make an arrangement for him to be bought here in Milan he can stay with me till Marc's health improves and you can visit him frequently.”I panicked and said. “Cathy, that is very considerate of you, considering even you have doubts about his birth but I don't want my son getting attached to something which will not be with him in the future after we return to London.” And Cathy doesn't know the truth so I don't want to bring Tio and make them suspicious. After all, he was the only family I had. And I will do anything to keep him with me.It's such an irony that even Cathy has doubts about my son.Cathy did not pester me further, as she looked at my expression.“But you will go with Marc to Piemonte,” Cathy said wisely, smiling. “Won't you Carmen?”I did not answer and sat there with my clenched fists, dazed between conflicting emotions.After a long time, I said, “If I go I don't want that blonde nurse to come along with us.” I somehow don't like her at all.Cathy’s eyes open wide. “What? “"They had sent a blonde nurse from their agency; Marc claims she is a ravishing beauty.” I knew I was being childishly blunt about my jealousy, so be it; I stared at Cathy with my lip stuck out in a pout. “Change her and get someone older I will not have Marc teasing me with her while we're there!”Cathy laughed delightedly. “Did he say that?”"Haha, ha.............." Cathy was laughing merely, while I was a little embarrassed. I don't know what's gotten into me but I knew if the nurse comes along Marc will tease me forever.“Quite deliberately, he made no pretense of it, but I won't have it,” I said sternly.Cathy's eyes sparkled. “I will get a very strict and older nurse don't worry I promise. I will talk it out with the doctor.”“Now let me see him if he flirts with her,” I said in a high voice, happily. At least I have a say in this matter.“I will choose the oldest and plain Jane nurse they have on their books,” Cathy said laughingly and as she walked to the door with me later she said softly. “And you pretend to be indifferent to him!”I laughed and said. “Indifferent! I wish I was, but it doesn't mean I have forgiven him. I never will.”