I move my hips and grab his manhood. Theo looks at my face as I guide him inside me. I am still sensitive, but I know that he needs it as much as I want him to. So, I let him enter me. At first, he is hesitant, but as I moan at the way he is being pushed inside me, throbbing and huge, he starts to thrust.
I grab his head and he buries his face in my neck, while I grab at his butt and spread my legs wider for him. He starts to groan in pleasure and his pace becomes faster. Both our feverish bodies are rubbing against each other, making delicious friction. He releases inside and I make sure that all of him will remain inside.
And it repeats multiple times that night. It's as if our body will not tire of making love over and over with each other. More so, each act becomes more pleasurable than the previous. We are getting used to each other's bodies again. Memorizing each pleasure point, ensuring that we give more than the other. It's like a competition of who can give a lot more. Until I am left panting for air and I can't go on any longer.
My eyes flew open the next morning. There is a delicious ache in my body. There are bruises and love marks. More importantly, I am very sore between my legs. I am already in bed and Theo is nowhere to be seen. There is a bath and breakfast prepared and slowly, I remember what we've done last night.
I have just broken my promise to myself! I betrayed my unborn child by getting lost in my passion! How could I allow Theo and myself, to get drowned in pleasure again? And that amount of his seed, do I want a repeat of that rough pregnancy again?!
I sit up from the bed and lean on the headboard. I hug my knees to my chest and cry. I am stupid. I am weak. I am shallow and undisciplined. I hate myself.
The doors open and I can smell lavender, together with other smells. "Kaiya I called for the servants to reheat our food. I thought that you want-" he pauses. Then, he climbs on the bed. He must have seen the trembling on my shoulders as I weep.
"Everyone. Leave," he orders. I hear the scurrying of feet and then the closing of the door. He approaches me. "Why are you crying, Kaiya?" he asks. His voice sounds strained. "I was just out to get food since you are still sleeping."
I did not respond. He raises my chin and I glare at him. It's not his fault, but somehow, I want someone to blame for this frustration of not being able to fight the mate bond even when it almost breaks my mind in pain before.
"Are you perhaps regretting what we've done last night?" he asks, his voice trembling.
"You should know that, my King."
His expressions battle the pain. His fingers tremble and he closes his fist instead. "Didn't we promise last night that we…" he swallows. "... belong to each other from now on?"
"I was in the midst of pleasure. I was not thinking straight. You should ask me when you are not currently fucking me."
He jerks and I glance at his fist. "And you are choosing this route of hurting me again?"
"Who really is doing the hurting between us?"
His eyes soften, and he caresses my face, but I only glare at him. "Kaiya, you are being hot and cold to me. I can't take this anymore, please…"
"Last night is just a mistake. From now on, I will just be cold, even if you do shrewd things to confuse me."
He purses his lips, and his fingers tighten on my chin. I grimace but he didn't let go. Then he kisses me, and I keep my mouth tightly shut. When he knew that he can't force my lips open, he falls on my lap and hugs my waist.
He buries his face on my lap and whispers, "Kaiya, I don't want this. I can't take this anymore. Do you really want to break me?"
I clench my jaws as I stare at the top of his head. I want so much to touch him, to assure him that I love him more than anything in this world. Instead, I clutched tightly on the blanket, with my knuckles turning white.
"Please understand that I am your personal guard. I can no longer sleep on your bed. From now on, I will sleep on the couch or the floor."
"You can't do that," he says.
"You know that it's outside the duty of a personal guard. Or do you want to be known as the King who raped his guard?"
"R-raped? You know that I never forced you to make love to me."
I get out of the bed and out of his hold. More and I might just respond to his touches. I wear my clothes that are strewn all over the room and turn to face him. He looks like an abandoned dog as he stares incredulously at me.
"We are nearing Duran for our stop-over. So, call me if you are going to stroll around once we arrive."
Then I close the door on him. I smell like lavender and I need to take a bath to take the smell off me. I also need breakfast, so I need to ask Ami how she does these things.

********************
As I submerge myself in the bath, I make a loud moan. Ami giggles who is in the tub next to mine. "You sound like an old lady."
"My muscles are aching," I answer. I glance at her to catch the reddening of her cheeks. "What is it?"
"Well, I come to know that you are not really the King's personal guard." Then she reddens all the more.
"Why are you blushing?"
"I kind of heard you last night with the King."
"Heard me?"
"You are moaning."
"Outside my door? What are you doing there?!"
She waves her hands in front of her face and says, "It's not like that. Captain Klevon's room is next to yours and I have something to give him. We kinda heard you and the King having sex."
I pale. "Klevon's room is next to ours?!" That king! How could he do that?! "And? How is Klevon?"
"He goes out of the room, and well…"
"Klevon did something to you?!"
"Oh, no! Of course not! I am too young for him, but he looked to want to destroy something."
I take a deep breath. Seriously, this is all wrong. Last night should have never happened. I'm such a slut for even allowing that to happen. Now, I doubt I can even talk to Klevon. I pause. Why the heck am I being sensitive about him?! He's not some fragile man and besides, I never asked him to like me. Also, he is just a pervert! I should not care!
"How does it feel like to be in the midst of a love triangle with two handsome men vying for your attention?"
"I'm not in that kind of situation," I say.
"I think you are. To tell you the truth, I was a bookworm when I was a kid. I like to read romances and I want to experience them when I get a little older. But as you can see, people change. And the two men with me are not good targets for that kind of romance."
I roll my eyes. "Last night with the King is a mistake, okay? I should have never allowed that to happen. And I need to be punished for having sex with him."
She grins. "In your case, I think the King will punish you if you don't have sex with him."
"Please, can we stop talking about him? Last night will be the last time. I actually like the kind of life you lead. You are free and you can go wherever you want. And besides, we are nearing Duran right?"
"Yes, we'll probably arrive tomorrow. Why?"
"Are they the types of men you like?"
"Well, they are handsome but don't suggest that I should have a fleeting love with them. To tell you the truth, I am still a virgin. Giving that up to a stranger would be scary."
I grin. "Then you can just flirt with them. I will be with you, so any untoward touches will be automatically rejected. Besides, two magicians are better than one."
Ami laughs. "I am looking forward to tomorrow then."