I stifle my voice as I run and hide in the gazebo, making sure that I am covered with the seat's blanket. Crouching in the corner, I cry while wrapping my arms around my knees. It's about to get dark, and I really need to return to my room.
Suddenly, I hear a voice. It's Aditya's voice. "You finally decide to meet me again," she says.
I am about to get up from where I am hiding when I heard, "I told you I am busy. I have no time for this."
It's Theo's voice! It's been a long time! Oh, moon goddess, I miss him! I will meet him, I–
"Busy on what? Impregnating your harem women as fast as possible?" Theo did not respond, so Aditya continues, "I told you, make me your first concubine."
Hearing that, I stay put and once again hug my knees to my chest.
"No," is the flat reply.
"You don't need to think about my jealousy. I understand the need to have heirs, to have other women. All I ask is one night every week. As long as I have your heart."
"You will not have my heart."
Ignoring what he says, she continues, "You don't have to care about destroying your friendship with my brother. Besides, there are a couple of things you can get from having me. I am the Djambek kingdom's previous king's sister. You can further strengthen your country with a stronger friendship with a Djambek king."
"You are the current Djambek King's previous lover and now you want to be my concubine? Do you think that will earn me friendship? Besides, you are infertile. I have no use for someone who can't get pregnant."
I clutch my chest at his words and my arms tighten around my body.
"If you help me bring back our family to power, you will have anything you need."
Theo snorts and says, "In the end, it's still your ambition that's driving this. Your brother has no ambition like that."
"Then put me in power. Make me yours, even if I am only your concubine, and I will give you Djambek."
"I am not planning for domination and destruction of other Kingdoms."
"Ain't that what you did against the Weiller family?"
"They are a merchant family. Their clan is the only thing I destroyed, and they all deserved it."
"They are planning to create a new Kingdom, but you snuff them out before they can even build it."
"A kingdom full of slaves," Theo retorts.
"Ha! We both know you are not a hero who cares about slaves. You really only cared for one slave!"
"Is jealousy the only reason you call me here for?! I warned you not to tell her about the harem. Be grateful I did not exile you. You are not even in prison. The only reason I am not doing any of that is because of your brother."
"You think she will love you?" she whispers.
"She loves me."
"Ha! Without the ancient mate bond, she will not even look at you! Even if you are the King!"
"Shut up!"
"If she knows what you are, do you think the love in her eyes every time she looks at you will remain the same?! No! She will break and reject the mate bond if she knows what you are capable of! If she knows what you did to build your own Kingdom, she will hate you!"
Suddenly, there is a scurrying of feet. I hear Aditya choking. And then the sound of being dropped to the ground.
"But I don't," Aditya whispers. "I understand everything you did. And even without ancient magic, I love you. I am offering myself to you, Theo. And I know who you are, all your needs, your fetish, but all of that I accept. We are the same kind of people. Cunning. Vicious. Cruel. I can help you, as long as I am beside you. Love me and I will not leave your side. You can be honest with me too."
"This conversation is done, Aditya. If you continue being like this, leave. I have no use for a woman controlled by her desires for a man."
Theo leaves but I stay hidden in the gazebo. I hear Aditya crying softly. I cover my ears. This is the reason why she doesn't want to be my friend. She is in love with Theo!
And the things he said, it's as if he is telling me those hateful words instead. Werewolves have problems getting pregnant which almost makes me infertile. And I desire him. I am still here because of the mate bond. Does that mean I am as useless as Aditya for him?
No. I am worse than her, more useless than her. I am stupid and ignorant. I forgot everything that happened from before fifteen years ago. And despite being a werewolf, I am so much weaker than his Generals. Worse, I was a slave and I have nothing. All I can give him is pleasure in bed, and who knows if he's faking those.
They might be talking about another woman. Because, without the mate bond, Theo doesn't have a reason to love me. There is no reason for him to desire my love. Besides, he already got it. I am irrevocably in love with him.
If all else fails, if he tires of me, can I even have the courage to reject the mate bond with him? But is there a need? He doesn't feel it, so I don't really need to declare it.
Then I whimper, my heart is clenching and my tears are continuously flowing. I hate this. I miss him. I love him. Oh, moon goddess. Why did you give me a mate like him?


**************************
"So, there's my little werewolf."
I look up to see Klevon peering at me, while I hide underneath the seats of the gazebo. He is smiling brightly at me while parting the blanket that shields me from both the sun and the people outside. The sun shines behind him, giving him an eerie, but refreshed look.
"Good morning," he adds.
With his arms leaning on the seat, he whispers, "So, why are you hiding? Everyone's looking for you since last night. The King didn't see you in your chamber during his nightly visits, so he's kinda panicking."
I hide my face in my arms again. Liar. Theo never visited my room. Not once, since a few weeks ago. He is busy with other women. Why would a lone werewolf matter to him, anyway? He even had time to meet Aditya, but not me. I am no one.
"Come out now, little werewolf. My arms are getting numb."
I didn't respond. Just let me be. If I get out now, I will spend the whole day with Harbin and Brandon. I will be taught everything there is, but never meet up to their expectations. Not even enough to be Theo's lover. I will remain like what he said, a little werewolf.
Tears fall. This is hard. I just want to hide. At least on the island, I can fight physically. I have the drive to fight for my survival. But here, it's my mind and heart that are being attacked. I can't handle it.
"Kaiya… Is it getting hard now?"
Klevon's voice changes and I raise my head to him. He reaches for my face and wipes the tears on my cheeks.
"Do you want to leave? To escape?" he asks, totally unlike him. "I told Theo that werewolves are not meant to be kept and imprisoned in a castle. Being a werewolf hunter, I know you guys thrive in the wild."
I clench my jaws and move away from his touch.
"If you want to escape, I can help you. You can hide in the Owusu or any forest."
Frustrated that even Klevon is pitying me, I hide my face again and whisper, "Leave. I don't want you here."
Besides, if I leave, what will be the difference from being in the hunting park? No, there is. At least in the park, my family is there. Nowra is there. Here, I have no one I can trust. I thought I can trust Theo, but it's not the case.
"You only want him, huh?"
I didn't respond. But when I didn't hear any movements from him, I look up again. He kisses my forehead and pulls back.
"I won't lie anymore," he says. "I like you. There is some kind of magic that's pulling me to you. When I saw you on that island, I feel excited. Not because I want to hunt you, but because I am vaguely aware that I have found my partner."
Instead of feeling warm from his confession, I tense.
"But I can see that your heart belongs to the King. And we don't exactly meet in favorable circumstances. So instead of love and romantic partnership, will you accept my offer of friendship instead?"
I stare at him, the rigidness and stiffness are slowly vanishing the more he speaks.
"I will teach you how to fight properly. I will teach you everything I know. I will be beside you to help you navigate relationships in the castle. I will be loyal to you. I never liked to be a General, but if it is you that I will serve, I will gladly lay down all my skills at your feet. I will protect you and make you my priority. I--"
"Stop!" I say, cutting him off. "You don't sound like you are offering friendship. It's as if you are laying your life down like a knight to a lady. And I am not as noble as that."
He smiles uncertainly. "So, you don't want even my friendship?"
"As Harbin said, friendships are not one-way serving. And it cannot be forced."
Distracted at Klevon's disclosure, I push his massive form in front of me and get out from under the gazebo seats. I stretch out as I breathe in the morning air.
"I should go back to my room. Harbin will be furious," I say, walking out of the gazebo. But before I leave, I whirl around towards him and say, "Thank you," and then I make a small vow.
I didn't wait for his reaction, as I run from the garden towards my room.