"Come here," I hear Theo says.
I jump from his voice. "What is it?" I ask, shifting my attention to him.
I've been doing nothing for the past hour. Without books, I am so bored that I almost fall asleep. So, I shift my attention to him. He has now transferred from his work table to the carpet in front of the fireplace. There is no fire on it though.
I stand up and approach him. "Is there anything you need?"
"Sit here," he orders, patting the seat next to him.
I swallow nervously. Every time he is ordering me to come close to him, I know what will follow.
"I order you to sit," he repeats when I didn't move.
Without another choice, I sit next to him. I sigh. There are still another five days of stay here. There are still a lot of meetings and knowledge sharing about governance. And I want to go home. At least in Pitchford, Theo will be busy with his concubines which means I can get away from him from time to time. I am also not required to be in the same room as him.
Suddenly, Theo places his head on my lap and nonchalantly continues to read.
"What are you doing, my King?" I ask, looking down at his face.
"I just need something comfortable to lay my head on." His eyes shift to me and add, "If you'd like to massage my head and touch my hair, go on, I won't stop you."
His expression tells me that he wants something more though. The corner of my lips turns upward. I look away and stay seated as still as possible.
Theo shrugs his shoulders before saying, "It's your loss."
Then he returns to reading again. I glance at the thin book in his hands. It's about concubinage hierarchy in Orttenburg. As he flips the book, I also get enamored and read with him. I jump when suddenly there is a knock on the door.
"Enter!" Theo calls, not making any move to get away from my lap. I think I need him to move. His head is heavy.
A young Orttenburg servant enters. His eyes go to the couch first, to the worktable before he sees us on the rug. He is holding five books and there's a blush on his cheeks. He approaches and places the books on the rug next to ours.
"What is that?" Theo asks. The only movement he'd done is turn his head to the young servant and raise his knees.
"A gift to Miss Kaiya from King Seth," the servant nervously answers.
Theo scowls at me and then at the servant. I can sense his anger brewing. So, before Theo says anything, I interject, "Tell King Seth that I am happy with the gift, but that won't make me change my mind."
"King Seth says that these are one of the finest stories in the library. You are also invited to join him for dinner."
"I will try." I sense Theo getting up, but I lay my hands on his chest to keep him in place. "You can leave now."
The young servant bows, glances at Theo, then rushes to leave the room. When the door closes behind him, I can breathe again. I am somehow thankful that Theo did nothing stupid.
Then, my eyes transfer to the books from King Seth. The spine is prettier than ordinary books. Their primary purpose seems to entertain rather than to educate. I am about to reach for it when Theo shifts and hugs my waist. He even buries his face in my stomach.
Theo didn't speak. He just stays on my lap. Having the opportunity, I shift my legs to expel the numbness in them. However, Theo's grip on me only tightens. His frame is larger than I am, but he looks like a little child about to be left alone by his mother.
I let him stay like that, but it still didn't stop me from reaching for the book. My fingers haven't even touched the topmost book, when he screams, "No! Don't touch those!"
I freeze. "But these are gifts for me…"
His hold on me tightens all the more, and it starts to feel uncomfortable. "If its books you want, I can give you more! A roomful of books back in Pitchford! It might not be limited editions but-"
"These are limited editions?" I ask, glancing at the books again. Aren't those expensive? And how was he able to identify them as precious? These have colorful artistic spines, some have flowers, and vines and some have swords along their length. Is it how he's able to identify it?
Remembering what the servant said, I ask, "King Seth is inviting me for dinner. You need me to go, right? You asked me to spy on him."
He tenses again. "I change my mind. Stay here with me. I don't want you to spy on him, or give me information about him."
"Loosen your hands on me a bit, Theo," I say, pushing his muscular arms from my waist.
He buries his face all the more in my lap. Worse, his hand slips under my shirt and touches the small of my back which makes me straighten up my spine.
"Your stomach is churning, are you hungry?"
"Should I call for your lunch?" I ask instead.
"Our lunch. Eat with me," he says.
"You said it before, I can't share your food."
He takes in my scent, and his hands dangerously climb up my back. I stir from his hold and I try to take his exploring hands away from my body.
He lifts himself and looks into my eyes. "Other royalties can have a meal with you, but I can't?"
I draw back from the proximity of his face. "You're the one who ordered me not to eat with you!"
He reaches for my arms. "And I am rescinding that order!"
I snort. "Must be nice, playing around with your personal guard."
His features soften again, and then he touches his forehead to my shoulders. He didn't speak. He just takes me into his arms and embraces me.
After a while, I ask, "So? Am I allowed to go to that dinner invitation or should I stay here to watch over you? Besides, Princess Kissa will come tonight. I think it's better if I am outside before the two of you c-copulate."
I say it as calmly as possible. However, I still trip on the word. I can feel my heart clenching once again.
Same as me, Theo tenses against me. I also know that King Seth allowed Princess Kissa into Theo's room. He says that the sooner Princess Kissa gets pregnant; the better it is for the relationship between the two countries. He also adds that he doesn't want to stop Princess Kissa's desire. But I think he's hoping for something else instead.
"I don't love Princess Kissa," he says as if he is assuring me. But instead of pacifying myself, I only got angry.
"You don't love anyone, Theo."
He looks up at me. My pain mirrored in his eyes, "But Kaiya, I love you. I am certain of that."
Instead of being happy about the confession, I scowl at him–even if it's the first time he calls me by my name again.